postpartum doula

  • What They Don’t Tell You When You’re Pregnant…

    I don’t know who needs to hear this but…

    You deserve to thrive postpartum.

    Yup, I said it. And I wholeheartedly believe it. And you should too.

    I really mean it though. You should believe this deep down at the core of your being. Let me elaborate.

    You have spent so much time preparing your body and mind for pregnancy and birth.

    Changing your diet and excersizing more

    Reading all of the books and blogs and creating a birth plan

    Curating a registry and preparing baby’s nursery

    Celebrating with friends and family at your gender reveal and baby shower…

    All so that your baby gets the very best from the start.

    But I have to remind you of one thing. I have to let you in on something that many pregnant women overlook.

    I’m sure your birthing books and pregnancy classes have mentioned it.

    And other mothers speak about it in hushed tones with looks of pity or shame in their eyes.

    I have to tell you about this one huge thing that many new moms just like you say they feel unprepared for.

    They wonder “why didnt anyone tell me?”

    They wish they had done things differently earlier on. That they had done more to prepare.

    But I dont want you to think like them.

    I want you to know the whole truth BEFORE you give birth. So that you can truly prepare your mind.

    The truth that exsists no matter how you birth your baby. Whether you have a vaginal birth or a cesarean birth. Whether you have a birth with little or lots of complications. Whether this is your first or fifth birth. Whether you are planning a home, birth center or hospital birth. Whether you chose to hire an OB, midwife or choose to birth unassited.

    No matter how your birth story unfolds. There is one truth that exsists after you cross the threshold from maiden to mother.

    That one basic truth is that you deserve to thrive postpartum.

    Pregnancy and birth are just the beginning of the journey. Postpartum is when the real work of motherhood begins.

    You deserve a thriving postpartum.

    You deserve to rest and recovery after you give birth.

    You deserve judgement free support that allows you the time and space to recover from pregnancy and birth. You also deserve this time and space as you learn to care for and bond with your baby.

    Despite what some might say or think, it is possible to do more than just survive postpartum. Take the time to prepare for this time while you are pregnant and take the fear out of postpartum. Embrace a thriving postpartum mindset and take charge of your journey to motherhood. There will be so many unknowns, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t stay ready.

    With a thriving postpartum mindset you will:

    Get a strong start towards your infant feeding goals

    Learn and bond with your baby with ease

    Maximize the growth and changes in your brain

    Strengthen your momfidence (mom confidence)

    Discover the new version of yourself and level up with ease

    Discover and embrace your new identity as a mother

    Stay connected with your partner

    Strengthen communication and intimacy

    Find and embrace your village of support

    Process your birth story and let go of birth trauma

    Reduce complications as you recover from pregnancy and birth

    Make time for self care

    Get as much restorative sleep as possible

    Let go of fears of postpartum depression

    With a thriving postpartum mindset your baby will get the very best YOU from the start.

    I know its a lot to take in but I know you can handle it. If you start planning now while you are pregnant, you will feel ready and confident with a toolbelt of resources at your fingertips.

    Don’t be that mom that vows to do things differently next time around. Do what you feel you need to do THIS time so that you have the best postpartum possible.

    And if you’re not sure where to start, contact me and I’ll be happy to help.

    Plan Ahead For A Thriving Postpartum

  • The Benefits of Hiring a Postpartum Doula

    Postpartum doulas are an invaluable,  lesser known birth professional. As a new mother or father, you can benefit from inviting a professional postpartum doula into your home after giving birth.

    Whether this is your first or fifth child. or if you gave birth vaginally or by C-section, a postpartum doula can help make your time after giving birth a blissful, enjoyable time.

    New parents who have enough practical and emotional support adjust to parenting better than those who do not. A postpartum doula helps take care of the home so that you can focus on bonding, breastfeeding, resting and recovering.

    A postpartum doula is right there to encourage and support you when you need it most.

    New mothers who have a support network including their partner, family members, care providers, doulas, counselors and peer groups have greater breastfeeding success, greater self-confidence and feel less overwhelmed.

    Hiring a postpartum doula can benefit not only you and your baby but also your partner, family and extended family as well. A postpartum doula can teach you and anyone who will be caring for the baby about the newest methods and philosophies in parenting as well as reaffirm methods tried and true.

    The postpartum doula fills in the gaps when you do not have enough support available. This could be because you are separated from loved ones by great distances, work demands or many other circumstances. This could mean that you are ill- prepared or feeling overwhelmed or isolated.

    By hiring a postpartum doula, you will benefit from the wealth of information and experience on what to expect in the days, weeks and months after giving birth.

    The doula does this by educating and supporting the parents hands on with breastfeeding support, newborn care and what a healthy newborn looks like, bonding and attachment, and coping skills.

    The postpartum doula  can also connect you with community resources and local care providers as needed. The doula will also help you access, expand or even create a circle of support within your community.

    Parents who have  the type of support that a postpartum doula can provide, enjoy the following benefits during their postpartum period:

    • Increased chance of breastfeeding success
    • Reduced chance of infant dehydration and hospitalization with health complications due to informed care
    • Less chance of maternal postpartum depression and shorter duration and easier for mother to cope with it if it occurs
    • Less maternal exhaustion, frustration, and apprehension during early weeks.
    • Reduction in unnecessary calls to pediatricians
    • Dad back to work sooner with less anxiety
    • Greater understanding of newborn emotional and physical needs and behavior
    • More independent control of baby’s care in the face of overbearing relatives and advice givers due to education and early positive experience.
    • Earlier bonding due to more confidence
    • Paying for a doula gives relatives a way to give constructive help

  • 9 Questions to Ask Your Prospective Postpartum Doula

    Now that you have asked around and done your internet sleuthing to find a postpartum doula near you, its time to narrow down your search. Depending on where you live there might be 15 potential postpartum doulas or their could be just 1. Either way, its important to make sure that you and the doula are a good match and that you feel a connection with her.

    Though this person will be acting in a professional role for your family, her duties and objectives will require a deep level of trust and understanding.

    She will see you and support you during one of the most vulnerable times. She will see you go through struggles and triumphs.

    She will listen to your fears and worries and hear your birth story many, many times.

    She will help smooth the rough spots and deepen your connect you to your village.

    Because of this it is crucial that you find a postpartum doula that you feel supports you in the ways that are most important to you.

     

    Your first opportunity to get a feel for your prospective postpartum doula comes when you initially contact them. How attentive are they to your request for more information? Does their style of communication work for you?

    The second major opportunity comes at your consultation when you get to meet the postpartum doula face to face. This meeting will have a large effect on how you choose to move forward. Make the most of your no obligation consultation by asking any and all of your pertinent questions.

     

    A great question to start out with is:
    1. WHAT LEAD YOU TO THIS WORK?

    Get a feel for why and how she came to this work. Her motivating forces should resonate with you.

    Next, you can ask about her professional experience as a postpartum doula:
    2. WHAT TYPE OF TRAINING DO YOU HAVE?

    3. WHAT KIND OF EXPERIENCE DO YOU HAVE?

    In the United States, doula work does not require any sort of training or certification. Nor is there a national certifying body for all doulas. Private companies provide training and certifications, but they are not required for one to work as a postpartum doula. One can simply decide to be a postpartum doula.

    Because of this it is up to you, the consumer, to decide if a prospective doulas education and/or experience are satisfactory for your needs. It may important to you that your postpartum doula be a mother herself  or that she have some formal training even though she is not certified. It might be important for you to have a postpartum doula that has trained and become certified through a specific organization. Or perhaps you would like to hire a doula that also provides certain services like placenta encapsulation.

    Its ok to ask the postpartum doula if she has experience with a particular situation, condition or service.

    After learning about the postpartum doulas experience and educations, you can now learn more about her schedule and how your care will be provided by asking:
    4. HOW MANY FAMILIES DO YOU WORK WITH AT ONE TIME?

    5. IS YOUR SCHEDULE FLEXIBLE? DO YOU HAVE A BACK-UP, AND IF NOT, CAN YOU REFER ME TO ANOTHER DOULA, IF NEEDED?

    6. WHAT HAPPENS IF THE MOTHER GIVES BIRTH EARLIER (OR LATER) THAN EXPECTED?

    Each doula has her own way of scheduling clients. Some doulas schedule multiple families at one and work with a back up doula to ensure. Others may work with only on to two families at a time. Most doulas schedule family strategically based on the baby’s due date, so its important to know when you care will start if your baby comes earlier or later than anticipated. This is the time to learn about how your prospective doula does things.
    Get a feel for the types of resources the prospective doula can connect you to by asking:
    7. HOW DO YOU SUPPORT A PARENT AT RISK FOR A POSTPARTUM MOOD DISORDER?

     

    Your prospective postpartum doula should have a list of a variety of community resources to connect you will after giving birth. One of the main goals of a postpartum doula is to help a new parent find and build their village. This network of support can include family, friends and professionals, like a postpartum doula.

    This one is self-explanatory. You need to know if you can afford to hire this prospective doula:
    8. WHAT IS THE FEE FOR YOUR SERVICES?

    9. DO YOU OFFER A PAYMENT PLAN, SLIDING SCALE OR BARTER FOR SERVICES?

    If your prospective postpartum doula’s fee is more than you anticipated or can afford, its worthwhile to ask about  a payment plan, sliding scare or bartering. Many postpartum doulas are willing to work  with you.

    Lastly, see what other moms like you are saying about your prospective postpartum doula:
    10. CAN YOU PROVIDE REFERENCES FROM OTHER FAMILIES YOU’VE WORKED FOR?

    Ask for references, client reviews and/or testimonials so that you can read/ hear the real experiences of families who have worked with this postpartum doula. If you like the postpartum doula but find that a reference or review raises more questions or concerns, do not hesitated to reach out to the postpartum doula to address them.

    The postpartum doula interview is a chance for you to get to know the postpartum doula before you invite her into your family’s home. Write down your questions in advance, to ensure that you get the best idea of how the postpartum doula will fit into your life.

    10QUESTIONSTOASKPPDBLOG

    What other questions should new moms asks a prospective postpartum doula?

  • How to Find a Postpartum Doula Near You

    As a mother and a postpartum doula, I firmly believe that you and any woman giving birth deserves unbiased, practical postpartum support in the comfort of you home. And I’d be willing to bet that you and any birthing woman would agree.

    Unfortunately, it’s not so simple to just believe that every family should have access to a postpartum doula. You need to know what exactly a postpartum doula does and how to find them near you.

    Where does one even start when looking for a postpartum doula?

    Google Search:

    First you are going to do a google search for postpartum doulas in your city. My favorite search term is “postpartum doula in Bowie Maryland.” Just switch out my city and state for yours. Check the first 3 pages for doulas near your city and write down the information for any doulas that interest you.

    Ask Around:

    Now its time to get some personal referrals.

    Ask family or friends if they have worked with a doula or know anyone else who has.  This is a great way to get uncensored, real-talk, experiences about working with a postpartum doula.

    Ask your OB/GYN if they can recommend professional support for you based on your needs. Your OB/GYN may have more knowledge working with birth doulas who provide labor support but they should be able to point you in the right direction.

    Ask other providers who lead parenting classes, play groups, and provide breastfeeding support. Leaders of national groups like La Leche League and Moms of Multiples might also be able to help. These professionals usually have a large network or family related resources.

    Doula Directories:

    Now, that you’ve asked around and gotten ideas from friends, family and local professionals its time to take our search back to the internet. Online directories are a great way to find local doulas who are available around your due date or who have specializations like experience working with multiples or being LGBTQ friendly.

    Two of my favorite websites for finding local birth and postpartum professionals are:

    • SistaMidwife Productions, LLC.  – search for black midwives, doulas and other birth professionals by State
    • DoulaMatch.net – search for birth doulas, postpartum doulas and childbirth education by due date and zip code. You can also narrow down the search by specialization and other services offered.
    • There are also several other website that list doulas. Check them out here.

    Birth Networks:

    Another great place to find caring birth professionals are area birth networks like the Maryland Birth Network and the DC- based Birth Options Alliance.

    Social Media:

    Last but not least, we take our search to social media. Social media is a great way to find postpartum doulas that are active and to see how they interact with moms like you. Social media is also a great place to find reviews and feedback on a particular postpartum doula. To search for a postpartum doula near you, can try searching hashtags like #marylanddoula or #marylandpostpartumdoula but with your state  (or city) in place of mine

    • Facebook– Hit the search bar and try searching for phrases like “Maryland postpartum doula.” Narrow your search by selecting Pages or Places. There may be a lot to sift through but you can also read reviews to help weed out the doulas who may not be a good fit.
    • Instagram– Search Places and enter your city. Or try searching a hashtag like #marylandpostpartumdoula  but with your state in place of mine. When you find a postpartum doula you think you might connect with scroll through their feed to get a better feel for their style. Check to see if they are on any other social media platforms to get a broader sense of their service offerings.

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    Finding a postpartum doula can be a confusing process. Keep your search focused by including your city and/ or state in your search terms. If you aren’t having much luck, try searching neighboring cities, your county or you closest metropolitan area.

    And if ALL else fails reach out to a postpartum doula like me and ask if they can help you find someone who works in your area.

  • 25 Things a Postpartum Doula Does

    By now, you may have heard about birth doulas and why you absolutely must have one at your birth. But do you know what a postpartum doula is? Some might argue that a postpartum doula is even more essential than a birth doula.

    But what exactly does a postpartum doula do?

    Really, it depends on your unique needs after giving birth. A first time mom bringing home her baby will have a very different set of needs than a mom bring home her 3rd or 4th baby.

    Your pregnancy and delivery will also determine what kind of help you need after giving birth. Moms who have preeclampsia or gestational diabetes may need closer monitoring following labor and delivery. Moms who had a cesarean or tearing may need extra help with cooking and chores so that they can stay off of their feet.

    Regardless of your needs a postpartum doula can help you in the following ways:

    1. Listen to and help you process your birth story.

    2. Talk through and help you process fears you might have surrounding your postpartum recovery.

    3. Recognize risks and signs of postpartum depression and make referrals for mental health support.

    4. Coach you on how to ask for and accept help. Help you find your voice to say “no” to support that is not aligned with your goals.

    5. Recognize normal physical recovery. Make referrals when necessary.

    6. Go with you to your postpartum check-up and hold your baby so you can get the most out of your visit.

    7. Go with you on your first outing with your baby so that you don’t feel overwhelmed or alone.

    8. Hold your baby so you can take a nap, a shower, a walk, read a book, journal or whatever self-care you need.

    9. Bring you food and drink so you can stay in bed with your baby.

    10. Help organize all of the baby stuff you have.

    11. Help set up a safe sleep space in your or your baby’s room.

    12. Help set up a breastfeeding space so you have all of your nursing essentials at your fingertips.

    13. Provide hands on breastfeeding help and education.

    14. Support your breastfeeding goals without judgment.

    15. Provide evidenced based education on other feeding methods like feeding your baby pumped milk or even using formula, if that is your choice.

    16.  Model how to hold, bathe, dress, swaddle and calm your baby so you can feel confident in your new skills.

    17. Help navigate through all of the baby gear to help you find what works for you and your family without the hassle.

    18. Show you how to wear your baby for even closer snuggles and skin to skin bonding.

    19. Process your placenta for alternative healing, at your request.

    20. Help with some household chores so you can focus on your recovery, breastfeeding and bonding.

    21. Run errands for you so that you can rest and recover.

    22. Pick up groceries so you can focus on your baby.

    23. Prepare freezer meals or prep veggies and fruits for nourishing meals and snacks that support postpartum recovery.

    24. Show you how to wrap your postpartum belly for extra support as your body adjusts to not being pregnant.

    25. Work with dad, grandparents and other caregivers to strengthen your baby’s village.

    Now, don’t you agree that everyone becoming a new parent deserves THAT level of care and support after bring their new baby home?

    Postpartum doulas are an amazing addition to a new mom’s support network.Now that you know just some of the things a postpartum doula can do its time to think about how a postpartum doula can benefit you specifically.

    A great place to start is to think about 2 or 3 of the biggest struggles you anticipate facing after birth. Jot down your answers on this free worksheet. You can use it later on to start a postpartum plan or as a guide when interviewing postpartum doulas.

    Next, think about 2 or 3 (or more!) people in your current village that you can count on to support you through each struggle.

    Third, write how they can specifically help you face this challenge.

    Do you have enough coverage? You may or may not. But the reality is postpartum is more than 2 or 3 issues that arise and then go away. You are constantly experimenting and adapting to your baby.

    The early days after your baby is born might seem great but you will also be vulnerable, raw and evolving.

    Think about somethings you feel you might need help with but not feel so comfortable asking a family member or friend to do.

    If you are not so sure about who you can rely on, it may be time to consider broadening your postpartum support network. Luckily, there are lots of caring professionals ready to help you out in real, practical ways after giving birth. You deserve it!

    25thingsappddoes

  • The January Tea | Newsletter

    January 2018

    Hey, 2018, hey!

    I hope you are having the best new year yet! If you are like me you are low key VERY excited for 2018. I just have a feeling that  this year is going to be a stellar one.

    .WHAT’S NEW WITH THE PRIMA DOULA

    As the holiday season winds down and we say hello to 2018, this is the perfect time to set new intentions and make changes in our lives. I have many goals myself, both professionally and personally and one of them is to stay connected.

    I want to stay connected with you so that I can better serve you and other families like yours.

    Let’s stay in touch!

    • Let me know what you need from me as a postpartum doula

    • Tell me about your new goals as a mom or dad

    • Follow me on social media @theprimadoula. I’ll follow you back!

    • Share your moment of #postpartumrealness

    • Leave review of your experience working with me

    .NEW SERVICES

    This year, I will be adding several new services to support you after you give birth. I will still be providing in home postpartum care but now I will also offer the following services:

    • Mother Blessing Ceremony Planning and Facilitation

    • Postpartum Belly Wrapping

    • Prenatal Belly Casting

    You might also notice that I have streamlined my services by creating Postpartum Care Packages. These packages combine doula care with Planning and Pampering services to provide wrap around care that meets all of your needs.

    Check them out below:

    .JANUARY AVAILABILITY

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    .FREE CLASSES

    janclassschedule

    REGISTER HERE

    .LEAVE SOME LOVE

    Have you worked with Prima Postpartum Services in the past?

    Did you love it or not so much?

    Either way, I want to hear about it!

    Share your experience and give feedback so that I can better serve families like yours.

    CLICK HERE TO SHARE YOUR FEEDBACK

    .ONE MORE THING

    Do you know any Maryland or Washington DC area families expecting a new baby in 2018?

    Will you do me and them a favor and forward this email along to them?

    I want to provide 5 hours of doula care FREE and I know you can help connect me to families and new moms who need some extra support.

    Thank you so much for your support and I hope this year is your best one yet!

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  • Postpartum Fears

    Today we are talking about fears surrounding the postpartum period. Fears you may have after giving birth and fears you may have now that you are responsible for this actual tiny person.

    The pressure can be overwhelming.

    Pregnancy and childbirth come with their own sets of fears and anxieties. But you will face a lot of expectations and challenges as you step into your new role as parent.

    Adjusting to your new life

    One of the biggest fears new parents face is if they can handle everything that comes along with parenting a new baby and maintain their previous life.

    Taking on this new role seems impossible at first but as the days go on you learn, heal and grow and you step confidently in your new role.

    A good way to combat this fear is to reach out to your village or network of family, friends and community resources. Talk to parents who have been through it before, listen to their stories.

    Do not be turned off by things they say that may scare you. Instead, anticipate how you might handle a similar situation yourself and gather information that will help you feel prepared to face that obstacle.

    Recovering from Pregnancy and Childbirth

    Many birthing parents have fears surrounding their physical recovery from pregnancy and childbirth. Parents who have a particularly challenging labor or delivery or give birth via cesarean face a slightly different set of fears.

    You may be worried about your postpartum bleeding or how an incision is healing or whether a medication will affect breastfeeding. Many birthing parents wonder “is this normal?” and “When should I call my doctor?”

    A trained birth profession like a postpartum doula knows normal recovery and when you should definitely call your care provider. A postpartum doula will also encourage you to follow your intuition and can also provide tips and tricks to help your recovery go smoother.

    The Baby Blues and Postpartum Depression

    You may have heard of the baby blues or know someone who has experienced the weepy moments that many new parents have. This is common and usually dissipates after a few days or weeks.

    A huge fear that you might have is fear that you could get postpartum depression. Or that you will be seen as a bad parent if you ask for help. You may have fears about having to see a therapist or take medication or that people might treat you differently if you show symptoms. You may even be afraid that you might hurt your baby.

    Many new parents do experience the baby blues and they usually dissipate shortly. For others the possibility of developing a postpartum mood disorder is very real.

    11-20% of birthing Americans deal with symptoms of postpartum mood disorders. And that’s only those that have reported their symptoms and does not include parents who experienced miscarriage or stillbirth. There are many more struggling in silence.

    The good news is that a postpartum doula is trained in caring specifically for the postpartum parent and is very familiar with normal postpartum healing and recovery.

    This professional care provider is trained to recognize symptoms of postpartum mood disorders and can provide you with resources and support to get the help you need.

    You are not alone

    As a new parent you will experience different fears as you transition into your new role. But you are not alone on this journey.

    Reach out to your partner, doctor, midwife or The Prima Doula for support if you find your attention focused on those fears.

    Getting the real help you need and increased confidence are just some of the benefits of postpartum doula support. Inviting a postpartum doula into your home can be a huge source of comfort and reassurance.

    Knowing you have evidence based, non-judgmental support from your doula will allow you to feel relaxed and confident during your postpartum period.

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  • Postpartum Doula FAQs

    What is a Postpartum Doula?

    A postpartum doula provides non- medical, physical, practical and emotional support for women postpartum. Her focus is to support household so that the newborn mother and baby can rest, recover and learn the dance of breastfeeding. Ideally, family and friends might help out once the new family has settled in after birth. A postpartum doula can help to fill in the gaps by providing education, guidance and nurturing support to new moms, dads, grandparents or any other caregivers. The benefit of inviting a postpartum doula into your home, is that this guidance is tailored to meet your needs and provided in the comfort of your own home.

    What Exactly Does a Postpartum Doula Do?

    The Prima Doula provides practical, emotional, non-medical physical support as well as various levels of postpartum wellness and breastfeeding education and support including but not limited to:

    Creating a postpartum plan

    Immediate postpartum support for vaginal and cesarean births

    In-home postpartum care

    Breastfeeding education and support

    Processing your birth

    Postpartum depression education, screening and referral, if necessary

    Newborn care education and support

    Light meal reparation, Grocery shopping

    Light household tasks, Laundry

    Nursery prep, To buy or not to buy

    Have something else in mind? just ask!

    But what about Dad? Grandma? Aren’t they enough?

    Many partners feel like they alone will be enough to support the newborn mother as she navigates the waters of childbirth and postpartum. Yet, they fail to realize they they themselves can benefit from extra support during this time. By providing education, practical and emotional support, breastfeeding education and support and assistance with realistic postpartum planning, a postpartum doula can help everyone in the newborn household have a smooth transition into the new normal.

    What kind of training does a doula have?

    I completed my bachelor’s degree in Family Science at the University of Maryland in 2008. I then went on to work as a support worker for first time mothers with a community non-profit organization. In 2012, I completed my postpartum doula training with Birth Arts International.